TRUTH HURT, LIES KILL

2010-12-31T05:29:00.003Z

Year 2010 has been a really dramatic year for me. So many unhappy events have occurred, nonetheless, I have grown up in terms of mentality. Human can only be more mature whenever it comes to adversity. Well, I don't like to complain over how much shit I've gone through. Because it's just a part and parcel of life. I learnt, I cried, I laughed, I depressed, I smiled, I achieved. And at the end of the day, I am always grateful that I survived. I am no longer allowed to act impulsive and according to my very own way given my ever-increasing age. It's time for me to be more independent and be more committed to my family. In my family, I'm always the one who is receiving, and come to think of it, I don't really remember what I've really brought to them. As I grow older, I can't help but to realise the importance of family, they mean so much to me and I am always ready to give up my life for theirs. One thing I hate about growing up is to see my parents growing older. It just hurt so badly to see them changed so much physically. Not to mention their deterioration in health, and to accept the fact that death is getting nearer. I know I sound very pessimistic but no one should live in self denial. All in all, I hope that everything will be better in the coming year. No more natural disaster, no more heart-breaking news, no more environmental pollution, no more wars and in short, world peace.

2010-12-16T13:19:00.002Z

Can't believe that I am back after abandoning this blog for so long.
Since I am uber free now, shall spend some time here.
Just ended my exam, has reached the killer part of ACCA.
Officially level 3 student, the never ending struggling period trigger me if I am able to continue the journey.
So far, life for ACCA has been pretty smooth sailing for me.
I hate to admit this,
but I am really a lucky person whenever it comes to exam.
However, it will be another stories this time round,
at least the final part will be different,
this is the first time I feel so unprepared for all the papers,
I did study but it wasn't sufficient .
All in all,
I've tried my very best as I still managed to complete all the questions.
Pray that miracles will once again happen.

2010-06-15T16:14:00.002Z

So many things to say,
but hardly have time to organize it out,
again,
I am standing at the T-junction,
feeling unsure about which way to go,
so much of uncertainties,
unforeseeable future,
couldn't help but to think that life is somehow pretty unfair,
but yet again what can we do,
stop complaining about how God has treated you differently from others,
this is stupid,
everyone has their own path,
no one is different,
we are a just a puppet,
if you still can't accept it,
that's too bad,
whether you accept it or not,
nothing is going to change,
in short,
I will move on.

LIFE

2010-03-19T03:18:00.002Z

It has been almost a month since my previous post,
many things had happened,
results out,
what else can I say?
I am a blessed one,
am really very grateful despite the little effort I've put in,
but feeling real stress for my upcoming paper,
it's almost insane,
don't even know where to start from,
had a small operation,
nothing else can be done without good health,
guess it's really time for me to lead a healthy lifestyle,
it really sucks to be sick,
shall never take things for granted.

2010-02-19T11:29:00.002Z

My CNY was like a repetition,
I guess most of the people had the same CNY,
non-stop eating, gathering,
not forgetting the red packet session,
it's really weird when the people of your age is giving you red packet,
this is funny,
meeting people who you will only see them annually,
no common topic,
but some random chat,
this is also the funny part,
anyway,
school reopening next week,
not to mention that the result will be released too,
I am feeling nervous now,
the outcome may be a cruel one,
may God bless me.

2010-02-08T04:18:00.002Z

I felt that the decision made few years back wasn't what I really wanted,
or maybe it was an unexpected one,
I am travelling on a very long journey,
there's no way I can turn back,
but to move forward,
I am still left with a choice,
which is to put it to an end,
I am just a little lost.

As time passed by,
I realize that I am really afraid of failure,
no matter how much mentally prepared I am,
failure makes us a stronger person,
but tell me,
how many of us are able to stand up again after each time of setback?
some may just leave it like that,
while some will change to be a better person,
no idea which ever one I would be,.

2010-01-29T15:19:00.003Z

School life sucks when you have lousy lecturers,
they may have the qualifications,
but they just don't possess the ability to teach,
unfortunately,
I've met quite a few in my life so far,
it's even worse at this point in time,
I just can't afford to waste anymore time,
and it's so stupid when your future is rely on someone like that,
I felt like a fool.

FIRST

2010-01-14T14:56:00.004Z

Things are getting harder,
I thought it might be a good start,
but it wasn't,
blurred vision,
Is this really what I want?
people change,
but I didn't change,
so why is it so complicated,
I hate growing up.

2009

2009-12-30T05:16:00.002Z

Going to bid goodbye to 2009 very soon, seriously can't wait for it to end as it simply marks a new start of another year.
To summarise it:
too much of procrastination
too many repeated mistakes
broken promises
unhappiness
unwanted attention
Nonetheless, I've learnt a lot and grown up from those incidents. Hopefully everything changes for the better and not the other way round.

2009-12-21T15:48:00.002Z

I always thought that I am ready for death, even at such a young age. This is an issue which I am not afraid of at all. In fact, since I was a little kid, I always wanted to leave the world at a young age. No idea what had really happened that left me such impact, but even till now, I've never changed. In my opinion, the ideal age is probably not more than 40. It might be a little too early for others, but that's more than enough for me and I am left with 20 years.

SIGH

2009-12-16T07:58:00.002Z

It's pointless to discuss anything after exam,
what's done can't be undone,
what the hell am I doing when I am given 5 days ?
serve me right,
I am fully aware that it will be a gone case,
no,
I am not at all disappointed,
am just angry with myself,
and feel sorry to them.

PRE-EXAM

2009-11-25T16:03:00.002Z

Will be having my first exam for ACCA in less than 2 weeks time.
3 papers for this seating,
but it's already enough to kill me,
procrastinating since forever,
I really hope that it will be a good start,
though I know that is nothing new to fail,
many candidates undergo that countless of time,
hopefully I can make it through.

STRUGGLE

2009-09-25T13:39:00.002Z

Finally I am reaching the stage which I always thought it was my dream. But I was wrong, I fabricated a beautiful lie in order not to be eliminated by the world, because I know how I will be ended up if I choose to follow my own step. Family has always been the major issue of whatever decision I've made. Disappointing them is the last thing I will want to do. They are my first priority despite the fact that I am a selfish person. Been trying so hard to make myself to believe that I am doing what I love. The feeling of self-deceiving ain't that good, even it's for those who you care.

DEMOTIVATED

2009-09-19T06:18:00.002Z

I have to survive,
somehow I am lost of the usual strength,
fully aware of what's my priority,
but have no motivation to carry on,
determination?
I am seriously lacked of that,
ever since GKW,
sigh,
what should I do?
I am left with no more time,
many people say that we can't choose what we want,
we can only accept as things come by.
I don't like what I am doing now,
but yet there's nothing I can do to make it better.

090909

2009-09-09T07:57:00.003Z

So, tell me why is everyone going gaga over this date?
what's so special about it,
it's just another day,
and to those who think that their marriage will last forever simply because they get register on this particular day,
is definitely being stupidly romantic,
sorry for being such a meanie,
it totally makes no sense to me,
so it was a bad day,
right from the start,
to me at least,
bad hair day,
heavy jam (classmate said that many people went to ROM),
so that's the culprit,
stood for an hour in the bus,
having law lecture for 3 hours,
claw is getting crappy,
can't wait for it to get over,
wonder if I am able to pass without putting extra effort.

2009-09-08T07:24:00.000Z

Things have changed,
I can feel a little disappointment in me.

SHORT

2009-08-23T11:21:00.002Z

Finally I am done with the remaining 3 papers,
to be more precise,
I've passed those papers,
I was really happy,
happy is an understatement,
you have no idea how I abhor to retake those papers again,
is like a disaster if I were to retake it,
but the happiness didn't last long,
in fact,
it only lasted for about 10 minutes??
Because I can already foresee the much more bigger challenge,
11 more papers are awaiting for me,
I really don't know if I am able to make it through,
especially within the time line set by me,
and once again,
miracles do happen,
even if I had not done my best.
God is great.

GIG

2009-08-16T14:16:00.002Z

I don't have the courage to wait for the outcome,
because,
somehow,
I think I know the result,
I am pretty sure that my prediction is accurate,
as for now,
I am loss,
is not for myself,
but for those who I care,
I am really sorry.

MIRACLES

2009-08-07T16:49:00.002Z

I really have many things to say,
many things to pour,
but I don't know where I should start with,
school has been started for about a month,
it's pretty hectic,
in fact,
many stuffs need to be completed,
but due to some reasons,
I've kept them aside,
because I am waiting for the verdict,
which I am very afraid to know,
the outcome may not be favourable,
but there's nothing I can do to amend it,
what's more when I am not the one at fault,
well,
I am not trying to push all the blame to others,
I believe I play a part too,
serve me right,
I brought it upon myself,
one more week,
and,
I will know what's the next step to take.

FINALE

2009-07-17T13:56:00.002Z

Started school like 2 weeks ago,
damn hectic,
hardly have time for myself,
assignments and more assignments,
and finally I am studying ACCA now,
wonder how long will it take for me to complete it,
well,
actually I did give myself a dateline,
within 2 years,
but after attending lectures for the past 2 weeks,
I must say that I am overestimating myself,
like again,
since when I am not anyway,
11 more papers to go,
need to accumulate 3 years of working experience,
before I really reach that stage,
will I be able to make it through,
why does everything seems to be so uncertain?
sometimes,
I do question myself,
did I make a wrong choice 2 years back?
as for now,
I am quite sure that I am not,
bear in mind TSY,
you just have to accept all those shits,
no matter how stink it is,
because it's your very own decision.

SORT OF

2009-06-29T16:06:00.003Z

Been neglecting my blog since forever,
that's because I really don't have much to update about,
well,
I do have friends who asked me things like,
"Hey, what's up with you?"
and hell yeah,
like seriously,
nothing really major has happened,
so what am I supposed to say,
I didn't want to be cliche,
no ups and downs,
considered that I am dead,
it's like a straight line,
I don't deny the fact that I am really a very boring person,
and I am perfectly cool with it,
as in I am happy with the way I lead my life,
so yeah,
why do I have to bother so much?
Anyway,
school will be starting soon,
which is next week,
sigh,
I can foresee that I will be having a tough time this time round,
August shall be the month to face the music,
once in a while,
I do believe in miracle,
and I hope that it will happen on me.

AH WELL

2009-06-13T15:21:00.002Z

Exam has officially ended,
I guess that's what I've been waiting for,
but I kind a miss those mugging period,
am I a freak or what?

Just like what I've predicted,
screwed my exam,
what else could be more sucks than this,
10 marks has happily flown away from the easiest paper,
afraid that I'll fail for t10,
I don't think I am able to excel for this sitting,
the truth is I definitely can't,
what a huge punishment,
I understand that it is pointless to have discussed all those shit now,
I am just depressed.

SAVE ME GOD!

2009-05-29T04:17:00.001Z

I can't concentrate
when my exam is in 3 days time
damn
I am done for.

HAIH

2009-05-14T13:40:00.002Z

I am not doing the right thing,
what's my priority?
have I given up on life,
left with nothing,
it's all empty.

SHHH....

2009-04-29T10:48:00.001Z

Keep your mouth shut,
this is very much appreciated,
grrrr.....

SRY

2009-04-18T16:09:00.002Z

was blog hopping just now,
and read an entry which left me some impact,
it was actually about a mother reprimanding his son,
it was roughly written:
"I spend more than 10k for your A level course,
and you are not been putting effort in your studies,
not at all, is not the problem of money but your attitude."

I was like the son, who have not been putting any effort in my studies,
I have a strong urge to say sorry to my dad. Who is always
-supporting me regardless of any decision I made
-ready to forgive me no matter how harsh my word can be
-giving me the best
-there to bear all my nonsense
He's been satisfying all my unlimited needs and yet this is how I repay him.
I am really ashamed of myself.
I just want to say I am sorry,
and I will try my very best.
This is not the first time I said this,
and this is also not the first time I've disappointed you.
But I hope this will be last time.

PICA

2009-04-13T15:57:00.002Z

NAH

2009-04-09T07:58:00.001Z

I shouldn't have entered the restricted area.

SLOW

2009-04-06T15:07:00.002Z

My poodle has been with us for about 3 months,
only now I realize that he's a red poodle,
I don't really like a poodle,
because they are too skinny,
without the fur,
they look like an alien to me,
though many people seem to love this breed,
but I am not so into it,
anyway,
I still love him very much,
so yeah you know I am not an irresponsible owner.

BACK FOR GOOD?

2009-04-03T14:24:00.002Z

Has not been blogging for quite some time,

wanted to stop blogging initially,

cause I don't see the point of updating,

ah well,

fickle minded,

so now I am back again,

anyway,

March is not my month,

have been thinking real lot lately,

since when did I stop doing that,

maybe because the exam is approaching,

not really though,

or because I am still left with 3 papers,

which I can't afford to fail,

am kind a disappointed with myself,

I am not motivated to study,

not at all,

I think I have let my parents down,

though I've managed to pass all the paper,

as for now,

but my attitude in studies really sucks,

dad has already spent more than 10k for nothing,

back in poly,

studying this course ain't cheap,

though my dad has never mentioned anything about it,

and is not that I have to worry a thing for it,

but I hate the fact that I am actually wasting his hard earned money,

and now I am still taking things in such a manner,

I am angry for what I've been doing,

I really wanted to do my best,

for them,

who always give me their support regardless of any decision I made,

I am very grateful,

but why can't I even try to do it,

I hope that everything is not too late.

NOW

2009-02-23T13:11:00.002Z

Cocky, smug, proud,
I don't give a damn towards how you people look at me,
I am who I am,
I love being myself,
nothing can bring me down.

DOUBLE A

2009-02-20T08:02:00.001Z

result released,
managed to pass,
am left with 3 more papers,
school is getting crappier,
4 months and I am done.

WOO

2009-02-11T06:47:00.002Z

School has been alright,
results will be released in few days time,
nervous? anxious? excited?
which is the more appropriate word,
I shall just pray hard for these few days.

2009-01-31T13:08:00.001Z

STOP TREATING ME LIKE A KID
I AM NO LONGER THE 3 YEAR OLD GIRL
WHO WILL STAY HAPPY FOR ONE WHOLE DAY
OVER A FEW SWEETS

I AM JUST A LIL TOO TIRED
I NEED MY OWN SPACE
I HAVE MY OWN PATH
WHICH I HAVE TO WALK ALONE
RELUCTANTLY
I CAN'T RELY ON YOU FOREVER
THERE ARE THINGS I NEED TO LEARN
ALL BY MYSELF
I'LL LET GO YOUR HAND SLOWLY
AND FINISH THE REMAINING JOURNEY
ALL BY MY OWN

CNY

2009-01-31T12:29:00.002Z

My CNY, was like a yearly routine
got to see most of my relatives once a year,
yes, no joke
we only get to meet once a year,
and I swear,
I don't even know all my cousins name,
I even got mixed up when I am trying to greet those uncles and aunties,
as in I don't know their rank,
that's the reason why I am never excited over CNY,
not even the red packet part,
what's the point to celebrate CNY with people you hardly know,
no common topic,
unfamiliar faces,
blood ties?
they never fail to ask you the same old question,

-how old are you
-what course are you studying
-where do you study
-what you want to be in the future

It's alright if there's only one person who asked you
but the fact is I've been repeating it for more than 10 times
to more than 10 different people
save me from this annually survey people.

TOY

2009-01-20T11:23:00.002Z

New term has started about 2 weeks, and what I did the most for the past 2 weeks are watching TV and playing online games. Sigh, there goes my new year resolution. Well, let's make another one then, since it's still not too late. I promise to spend more time at the study room right after CNY.

Let's talk about my new family member, which is the toy poodle.
He is hyperactive
attention seeker
fun to play with
but don't get too close to him
cause he loves too lick people face

POO-ED

2009-01-13T13:53:00.002Z

1ST

2009-01-12T14:54:00.002Z

New term has started few days back, am left with 3 papers. Hopefully I’ll be able to pass all my papers at one go. If I can’t even make it through for this, I don’t think that I have the minimum criteria to proceed to ACCA part 2. Sometimes, I really overestimate myself. I used to think that if I am willing to put in effort in whatever I do, I’ll definitely get the best outcome in returns. However, I was wrong. That naive thought of mine doesn’t seem to be true. So I guess the amount of effort that you put in don’t vouch you expected results. Well, maybe I have never really tried my best since there are people who saying things like human’s potential are unlimited. Hence, I’ll keep on trying until the story ends.

By the way, we have a new family member, it's POODLE.
Will post it's pic soon.
He is simply adorable:)

CALENDAR

2008-12-30T15:05:00.002Z

So, it's time to change the calendar.
How time flies huh? *cliche, I know*
I can't believe that 2008 has ended just like this.
Sigh,
what have I been doing all these while?
Nothing much,
except for the fact that I've been putting more effort in my studies,
did I?
Let's hope so,
New Year resolution?
can't think of any. . .

ULTIMATELY

2008-12-05T16:51:00.002Z

WHOOPEE!!!!

I am finally done with my exam,
actually I am not at all excited over it,
we tend to dread for holiday during exam period,
but when the long yearning holiday has finally arrived,
that is when I want to go back to school,
get it?
that's pure contradiction,
I believe that I have done my best for the first 3 paper,
as for the last paper of the day,
it was really a disappoinment,
it didn't turn out to be a good ending,
am kind a depress over it,
I may not meet the expectation,
but I have put in the minimum effort.

Lesson learnt from this examination,
never spot question,
this will really land you into the deep dark hole,
I am that type of student who don't study hard but smart,
that's why I love to spot question,
what's more when it has been pretty accurate most of the time,
so that is where I thought I have the so called potential in it,
and now I am in deep shit.

1 DOWN

2008-12-01T16:23:00.002Z

Angel: Why aren't you studying? You should have made full use of the remaining time.
Devil: Shut up! Life ain't about studying. Have fun master:)
Angel: You can enjoy your holiday after the exam, all you need to do is to work hard for these few days.
Devil: O man, you totally have no life.

I'd rather to be a person with no life?
Nah, that's not me.

HELLO

2008-11-26T08:12:00.001Z

Exam will officially commence next week. "sweat"
It has been quite some time since the last post,
preparation has been more or less 60%,
let's just wish me luck:)

LAST

2008-10-14T16:19:00.002Z

Finally I am here to blog. I suppose this will be my last post, it will at least last for 2 months. What's more, exam is approaching and I am handling 4 papers at one go. I can't afford to fail a single paper and I don't want to fail. So, I will refrain myself from coming online that often. Paper 5 and 4 shall be the killer. I am left with one more month, and I have more than 400 pages of theory to be read. Gosh, I don't think I can make it. So many things to take note, all those formats and principles, up to 30 formulas and tables. . . If you think accounting is easy, think twice. Well, it may be easy to those potential one, but unfortunately I am not.

JADED

2008-10-01T17:22:00.002Z

1.24 AM
I am really very tired,
but I refuse to sleep.
What am I doing when I am still left with no much time?
I don't want to repeat the same old steps all over again.

I am not obliged to keep my hp with me all the time.

FLU

2008-09-30T07:13:00.001Z

Damn,
I am sick,
I can't remember when was the last time,
sore throat, flu, body aching,
is it a must for all of them to come in one row?

S vs S

2008-09-28T14:31:00.002Z

I hate people calling me smart, maybe hate is too strong, dislike I guess. Well, it suppose to be a compliment but it just sounds kind of sarcastic to me. Nah, I am not trying to say that I am smart or whatsoever. In fact, I am seriously not smart. How do we define smart? I think it must at least be something above average which I am not yet in that category. Being average has been quite good if you were to ask me. There will also be a group of people who love to call themselves stupid. I have no idea what they are trying to convey from doing that. As I always believe that no one is born to be stupid. I despise people who never work hard but yet can't stop to complain over their poor results. What's the point of repeating all these when you jolly know that is all your fault?

We should know where we stand.

PAST

2008-09-26T15:33:00.002Z

What's the point?
Sometimes, opportunity cost seems to be the best answer.
I guess I was wrong,
Am I?

BD

2008-09-23T16:15:00.002Z

Special birthday shoutout for my bro:
HAPPY 23th BIRTHDAY TO MY SO NOT BELOVED BRO.
lol

our family tradition (ever since half a century ago, is from my dad's side),
we are not supposed to celebrate birthday,
I just got to know it lately from my mum,
don't ask me why,
I have no idea how to explain,
is something related to chinese custom,
no wonder my dad can't even remember his own birth date,
how pathetic is that huh?
imagine a person has not been celebrating his own birthday for half a century,
but my mum said that was kind of ridiculous,
so my mum die die also wants to help us celebrate when we were young,
even baked the cake herself OK,
I think she is trying to show how pathetic my dad is,
HAHA.

SOMEHOW

2008-09-20T14:58:00.002Z

Sometimes, I wonder have anyone really understood me. Well, maybe I hide my part of that a little too well. It takes both hands to clap after all. I don’t really expect anyone to know me inside out, but there were times when I would like to clarify about my ownself. No doubt there will always be a group of people who always misunderstand you simply because they don’t really know your personality. I understand it is quite impossible to take care of everyone’s feeling. We aren’t saint. Don’t leave any unnecessary remark when you don’t really read a person. No one wants to be misinterpreted.

So am l.

ABHOR

2008-09-18T14:47:00.000Z

I have no idea why am I landed in this plight.
Worst still,
I brought myself to it.

912

2008-09-12T14:30:00.002Z

Just want to thank you guys for all the birthday wishes,
am really appreciate it truck loads,
especially for those who managed to wish me when the clock struck 12 am,
all in all,
THANK YOU:)

FRETFUL

2008-09-05T15:50:00.003Z

Out of a sudden, something come across my mind. I can't wait to complete my CAT, though I am still left with 7 papers, which is also about 80% of it. Seriously want to finish it asap. Well, if everything goes well, I will be able to obtain my CAT cert next year. But wait, this is not the end of my education journey, I will then be proceeding to ACCA part 2.
It takes time, but somehow I feel like I have been wasting one whole year. Who can I blame huh? All in all, it's my decision and no one has ever forced me to choose that path. If I were given a chance to turn back the clock, I will still choose that path. That's how stubborn I am. But, I have not regretted over my choice. That's what I am more concerned about.
However, if not for that step, I might already be taking ACCA part 2 now. Which also means that I can complete my ACCA by 21. How cool is that? Provided that I didn't fail a single paper, which is also quite impposible. LOL

AVENUE

2008-09-04T15:27:00.002Z

Can one's character or personality change? Seriously, I used to think that a person character can never change because we are born with it. So is not possible for us to change easily. Maybe I was wrong, well, we often said that people changed. Thus, it's quite contradicting actually. As we grow older, living in a new environment, we have slowly changed, maybe not too major or obvious. Not everyone has split personality, so is acceptable for people to change. Transformation is nothing bad after all. We people get sick of something easily, even character? Getting annoyed of being the same old person all our life, we seek for changes in order to improve. No one hopes to be degraded, all of us demand a better life, hence the changes in us are inevitable. If one day, when I decided to become another person, does it means that I am no longer my usual self.

BROWNIE

2008-09-01T09:29:00.001Z

May you rest in peace.

Don't wish to say anything, since there's nothing we can do to bring him back.

SHIT

2008-08-31T16:24:00.002Z

It's public holiday, thus won't be going to school. Kind of tired with my current school life lately, it isn't bored. But somehow it's just lack of something, I have no idea what's that though. The paper is getting more and more complicated day by day, hence more concentration and study time is needed. Yeah, I know that I should be serious and not remain the usual me, which is the super duper lazy characteristic. Why can't I changed huh, not even for such a valid reason? Maybe I am that kind of people who will never change, not until the day I fail for all the paper. Trust me, we human will only come to realize our mistake when we finally has fallen into that deep dark hole.By the time, it's a little too late. Oh well, we always make silly mistake and tend to repeat it countless of time.
A new environment makes me understand how fortunate I am. I used to complain about everything in my life, nothing seems to be perfect to me. Among my peers, there are quite a numbers of people who need to work in order to pay for their school fees, who no longer stays with their parents, having family problem, who is in need in cash, who is facing with departure, who have no interest to study and yet there's nothing they can do etc. As compared to them, I am very much luckier. At least I am not facing with any of the problems stated above. So, do I even have the right to complain about those minor things I come across.

CURRENCY

2008-08-27T10:30:00.002Z

The conversation between me and my dad.

Me: I need money to pay for my exam fees, I think is about $1000.
Dad: Oh OK.
Me: Actually can be paid by using credit card.
Dad: Really? Like that is more convenient.
Me: Yeah, can do that online and don't have to waste time to go to bank to get the bank draft. But the currency has to be in pounds.
Dad: Huh, 1000 POUNDS!!!(his face expression is so damn hilarious, and he even emphasizes the word pounds)
Me: (laughing non-stop) Of course not, is RM 1000.

LOL...
My daddy is so darn cute.

RECENT

2008-08-26T16:22:00.002Z

Can't sleep,
hence I am here,
repeating the same old daily routine,
oh well,
who don't anyway?
I guess I am just too hard to please,
complain about every single thing that doesn't follow my way,

Just kind of discover the latest news,
among my peer,
won't be written in detail though,
somehow,
people need privacy,
just something to share,
giving up over a small setback,
seriously,
I really hate this kind of attitude,
is not that I never fell before,
I can understand how one feels when they are facing with obstacle,
especially when those people around you are in a higher position,
which even made you a smaller person among them,
but so what,
you don't live for them.

When I was in F4 and F5, that's the first time ever I failed for a subject which is A.Math. Worst still, my scoring marks are somewhere around 15++. Can you imagine, a person who can score 100 for Math can actually fail A.Math. It was kind a disaster to me. After trying so much, I still failed but with improvement, I score somewhere around 30++. But so what, I still failed after all. And knowing that half of the class will be dropping this subject, I feel like giving up and the determination of taking and scoring well for it seems to be died out. After much struggling, I decided to take the so called killer paper to me. I am not being stubborn, neither am I trying to overestimate myself. Because I always believe in one thing, if others can do it, why can't I. We are not much different. I went to tuition, and I tried my best to understand it. Ultimately, I managed to get B3 for that paper. From F9 to B3, it's a huge improvement I would say. I am glad that I didn't give up and I am very proud of myself. I may not be the best but I have met my expectation. We don't live for the sake of others but ourself.

It doesn't matter how many times you fell, but it does matter if you are able to stand up again after each obstacle you have met.
Thus, please don't give up.

ERR

2008-08-23T08:07:00.000Z

Who are they to decide if he is suppose to leave?
They are just being selfish,
And sounds like they are doing all these for his own good,
Just because he doesn’t k now how to express his feelings in words
Doesn’t mean that you can decide everything for him,
Due to your so called expertise in this field,
So what if you are really the expert,
It doesn’t mean that you have the right to kill someone,
In a self-proclaimed humanity destroyed method,
Simple word,
We call the act of that murder,
You are just trying to make yourself feel better by using words,
Even a person who has been diagnosed contracting cancer in his final stage,
Has the right to continue his life,
He may be suffering and struggling every single minute of his life,
But the thought of giving up has never come across his mind,
And the doctor has never advised him to end his life,
But tried his very best to release his pain,
But what you have done,
You simply judged him to death,
Without giving him a chance,
Not even one.

8888

2008-08-19T08:39:00.001Z

Has finally done with my first 2 paper,
Like finally,
So yeah,
Am quite disappointed with my result,
Though I managed to ace both papers,
Somehow,
I am not very satisfied with it,
Sometimes,
I really can’t be bothered with the outcome,
But,
It does matter if I am able to meet my expectation,
And this time round,
I failed to do so.
Hence,
The frustration in me,
All in all,
I have to step forward,
As I am still left with 7 papers,
Thus the disappointment in me won’t last long.

Self recognition is much more important than the others perception.
~Zenith

WONDER

2008-08-13T15:08:00.002Z

Didn't want to blog in the first place,
wanted to blog after my exam,
because I ain't in the mood to update anything,
but since I am online now,
so I shall spend a few minutes here,
In case you are wondering where I have been?
I am currently very busy with many stuffs,
not all related to school stuff though,
1.)watching Olympics
2.)preparation for the coming exam
3.)homework given
basically that's all I am busy with,
it seems like nothing much,
but watching Olympics itself spent me almost half a day,
and I am super pissed off,
when I will be having exam and extra classes during Olympics,
morning classes especially,
because most of the swimming competition held in the morning,
I can't even focus during lecture,
and I am not being exaggerated,
4 years once,
and yet I am not able to watch it,
sigh.

LUCK for my exam!!!

ABJURE

2008-08-01T15:40:00.002Z

Is not that I don't care,
but I choose not to be bothered with it,
because I am utterly disappointed,
with what I have seen all this while,
it just make me understand,
being a human,
there are too much for me to learn,
it just a part and parcel of life,
what I am going through now,
may not be the worst,
therefore,
I have to be strong.

One day,
when you are in the high position,
everyone treat you as a God,
another day,
you fell from the sky,
and everyone walk away from you,
it just took one day,
for everyone to left you behind,
after so much you have done for them,
sometimes,
appreciation really don't exist,
what's more loyalty,
all this is what we call,
LIFE.

What we can do,
is to accept it.

I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO ACCEPT.

SABOTAGE

2008-07-30T14:32:00.002Z

Just came back from dinner,
what a late dinner,
had it at Kinsahi,
and is so damn irritating to go out with my bro,
cause he is darn good at sabo-ing me,
make me so uncomfortable throughout the whole dinner,
he made fun of the waiter there,
so funny,
the waiter is so poor thing,
cause there's nothing he can do,
other than putting up a fake smile,
I have no idea why he is so immature,
I mean my bro,
then later on he fetched us home and went for mahjong session,
his life is full of entertainment,
this is so unfair.

JUDGE

2008-07-26T07:13:00.001Z

We judge any people every single day,
Don’t you dare to deny it?
We even judge or rather critic people that we don’t know and may not go to know throughout our life,
In short,
We judge anyone,
Be it good or bad,
No doubt,
I too love to judge others,
Be it my friend, family or maybe a passerby,
That’s human nature,
People judge us,
So why can’t we judge them as well,
Isn’t it fair?
But,
I have changed my perspective on that,
I no longer want to judge or comment on people that I don’t know,
Because the act of that may hurt someone unknowingly.
Worse still,
A person I don’t even know.

*no one can judge me*

INSANE

2008-07-24T15:14:00.001Z

Today was a long day. Well, it started of with lectures and more lectures. What’s more can you expect from a student? And we were all required to stay back for revision class, did 2 set of paper and were quite productive. Finished those papers too fast and the lecturer keep asking me to go home. I don’t know why. Stupid enough I have no choice but to be the first person who left for home. Reached home around 5 pm, watched my all time favorite YLBFB. Went out for dinner and after that went to Sutera Mall AGAIN. This is like the 5th time I went there for the past 2 weeks. Sounds so crazy, my dad keep on going there for coffee. Finally received that membership card from ACCA, though I don’t know the purpose of it but the member fee is so expensive. So might as well just keep it. LOL

OLC

2008-07-19T17:08:00.001Z

LETHARGIC

2008-07-17T14:41:00.002Z

New term has started last week, only managed to attend 2 classes on first week though. Didn’t manage to attend the first class was simply because they failed to inform us that the timetable has changed. I am totally stunned by their working style. Well, since the lecturer has given us the notes for the first lesson, it should be OK. This week is really a long week for me, went to attend the lessons for 4 days straight, kind of not used to it. Because I’ve been slacking all these while or rather for the past 3 months. Learning new stuff and exam will officially start next week. I need luck and concentration and maybe some last minute revision. The paper is getting tougher and tougher and I am beginning to be interested in it.

SERVICE?!

2008-07-15T13:26:00.002Z

I want to complain about MY bus service, seriously as for their service I really did not expect much from them. But what I asking for is merely the minimum standard of it. Their bus driver attitude sucks to the maximum. They don't know a single shit about their job scope, and worse still they are all deaf in nature. Like WTH, I didn't mean to be evil but they are way too much. They show no respect at all to those passengers.
Scenario:
I am about to reach my stop, hence I press the button, and I am not the only person who want to alight at that stop. Apparently, there are more than 5 people who want to alight. So there's more than 3 person who press the button, but ridiculous enough, that driver did not stop at that station but crazily continue with his route. All those people there including me are trying to press the button in order to remind him to stop in case he is really deaf. And finally he did stop the bus but refuse to turn on the door for us to alight. I was like TMD, I am running out of patience and can no longer control my temper. I don't care if he is really deaf or trying to act stupid. He is simply too much.

ADDICTION

2008-07-11T14:32:00.004Z

My current addiction:

*rubik cube, it gives me headache.

*apple and more apple, I used to hate apple, but I love them to bit now.

*green sour apple is my mum's current addiction, look at the amount my mum has to consume in a week time, no wonder she looks so sour.

DONUT

2008-07-09T04:26:00.003Z

Went to Tesco, Plentong yesterday,
And the main motive of going there is to get the Big Apple Donut,
Lame enough??
That’s the first outlet in Johor,
Queued for 1 hours for a dozen of it,
I know I sound like someone with plenty of time,
And the guy in front of me was a donut mania,
He bought 4 dozens in total,
He’s purely mad,
I must say that the taste was rather disappointing,
I still prefer the donut factory,
Because I don’t like their flavor.

DUH

2008-07-03T16:23:00.001Z

Feeling bored, hence I am here. I might be having my exam next week. Hope that this time round is not a false alarm. Or else, I will really whack them up. Despite whatever reasons they have. Human can only be forgiven twice at most. Definitely can’t be more than that, because they will never improve or worse still, degrade. Obviously enough, they were already in that category. Nah, I know I am being evil again. But yet it is a fact too. That’s the reason I have no mood to do any revision. They will pay for it if I happened to fail. Which I hope that will never occur.
Woke up quite early today which is around 10 am, should have been sleeping till 12 pm if mum didn’t woke me up. Accompanied her to eat breakfast and when to the hospital to get medical report. Stayed there for around 3 freaking hours, it’s such a waste of time. Later on, when to buy some miscellaneous stuff and headed home. What a boring life I had?
Next term will commence next week, will be learning things related to P3, 4, 5, and 6. I am so not excited about it. What’s more when those papers are getting tougher day by day? And worse still, I don’t like the lecturer for P4 and 5.All I can say is I don’t like the timetable for this term. Well, I guess I have no other choice either.

INFURIATED

2008-06-30T16:26:00.000Z

STOP delaying the date for the examination,
They are so inefficient,
So not productive,
One simple word to describe their working attitude,
SUCKS,
I am not being rude or whatever,
I am merely stating the fact,
And I am not the only one,
Who thinks that way,
So I can’t be blamed either,
New term will be starting soon,
But we have not yet started the examination,
WTH,
This is ridiculous,
I seriously don’t like the way they work,
So irresponsible.

FINALLY

2008-06-28T05:31:00.002Z

that's the cert that we have been waiting for years,
I don't understand why they spent so long to get it done,
and I took my PMR cert as well,
I guess that's the only straight As I can obtain through out my entire life,
hahs,
at least I get before,
better than none wey.

DOWNCAST

2008-06-25T06:32:00.001Z

Depress mode,
Friend A: I thought you are that type of person who has a very clear view towards your life.
Friend B: You must be someone with great ambition.
Friend C: I thought you have everything planned for your future.

Sigh,
I guess that’s how others look at me,
They thought I am a very confident person,
With high expectation of life,
And great ambition as well,
But,
Seriously I don’t,
Well,
I used to be that person,
However,
I am no longer a person with all those criteria,
WHY IS THIS SO?
I guess I have already lost the intent of life.

EVIL

2008-06-21T17:05:00.002Z

WTF,
just got scared off by that email,
heck,
I wish that I never opened that email,
now my imagination is running wild,
call me a scaredy cat,
and you know what,
it's 1 a.m now,
shit,
I want to sleep,
but,
that image keep on floating on my head,
please don't ever send those low down email to me,
you may find it INTERESTING,
but please think of those people who have weak heart like me!!

2008-06-20T06:10:00.000Z

They aren’t different,
They aren’t unique,
They aren’t special,
They aren’t weird,
They aren’t rare,
They aren’t incomparable,
They aren’t strange,
They aren’t distinctive,
They aren’t exceptional,
They aren’t eccentric,
They aren’t solitary,
They aren’t peculiar,
But they act as if they were.

PUNCTUAL

2008-06-18T12:55:00.001Z

I was super duper furious this afternoon,
As usual,
After school,
I took bus to Taman Johor,
Where I will be waiting for my dad to fetch me,
And I called him 10 minutes before I reached there,
So that I don’t have to wait for him while I reach the bus stop and all,

Me: You can come and fetch me already.
Him: You wait for me there; I will be late for A WHILE.
Me: Oh ok, you better be fast huh.

Never little did I expect that,
I have been waiting for his arrival for exactly one hour,
And when someone says a while,
I assume that it must be around 15 minutes,
But I was so wrong,
And after waiting for 40 minutes,
My patience runs out,
And being the very considerate daughter,
I refrain myself from calling him,
But after another 5 minutes,
I decided to call him,
Me: Eh. (angry tone)
Him: Oh, I will be reaching SOON.
And when I heard soon,
I expect that he will be reaching in 5 minutes time,
But I was wrong again.
Finally,
He reached after 20 minutes,
I wish that I could strangle someone at that point in time,
Seriously,
I am not trying to self praise of whatever,
But I have never been late throughout my whole life,
So I really can’t stand people, who always fail to meet the time,

In the car,
Me: Eh I tell you huh, if you know that you will be late more than 15 minutes, you can just tell me straightly, and don’t make me wait like a fool. Do you know that the weather is freaking hot and I am super hungry? Why didn’t you tell me you will be late for so long? I could go back by taxi.
Him: Sorry la, I didn’t know that you will reach so early.
Me: What the, don’t find excuses.

So the conclusion is,
Even your father will also find lame excuses.

2008-06-15T14:06:00.002Z

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!!!

My daddy is the best father ever,
but I am a worst daughter as well,
that's pretty unfair though,
he is the best gift I received from God.

WEEKEND?!

2008-06-14T12:17:00.002Z

Wasting my weekend by blogging,
it's the first time I stay at home during weekend,
don't be surprise,
I will definitely go out during weekend without fail,
that's explain why,
I always reject outing with my friends on weekdays,
when I am pretty sure I will be going out every weekends,
well,
I must say that I am a weirdo,
because I enjoy going out,
at the same time,
I am lazy to meet up with friends,
once in a while I am fine with it,
but if it is on a frequent basis,
it's a big NO for me,
yeah,
I know,
it's a contradiction.

13th

2008-06-13T04:35:00.002Z

woo,
it's black Friday,
isn't it cool,
uhm,
maybe not,
cool in what sense??
sorry for being random,
does it means that something bad will happen?
I don't think so,
I never believe such a thing,
just did a few questions of p1,
oh my brain cells,
figures can sometime be very irritating,
or rather confusing,
just have to admit that accounting isn't the right thing for me,
we have to love our job,
I mean in the future,
and is quite obvious enough,
my future job will be something related to accounts,
anyway,
we can't chose the things that we are interested in to study,
and your parents will be telling you things like,
"girl, you should face the reality",
"so accountancy is a better choice for you",
"after all",
"every company needs an accountant",
"and not psychologist",
yeah,
they are right,
so I shall move on:)

FUNNY

2008-06-11T12:45:00.000Z

I told my lecturer that I was absent on Monday,
But he claimed that he saw me on that day,
He was like,
“huh, I thought I saw you doing your homework there”
He must be seeing things,
It was so damn funny,
When to school,
And as usual,
We are now doing some revision,
Once the lecturer reached,
He will give us a set of paper,
Finished the whole paper within 2 hours,
I am so not productive today,
So after I have completed these 2 papers,
I will be proceeding to the intermediate level,
Will have to decide how many paper we will be taking for the next term,
Normally,
We are required to take 4 papers,
But I was thinking whether I should take more,
Since I want to get it done as soon as possible,
But my friend told me that it wasn’t that easy to handle so many papers at one go,
Maybe I should just follow the others,
Just take 4 papers instead of 6,
I shan’t overestimate myself,
The timetable for next term,
Isn’t a good one,
Have to stay till late afternoon,
I am so going to do well for my p1 and p2.

EARLY

2008-06-09T13:06:00.001Z

Went to Expo yesterday,
“The Big Groove 2008”,
Reach there around 6pm when that event will be starting at 8pm,
Reaching earlier is a good thing though,
Because as we reached there,
There were already crowded with people,
It was quite happening,
But some of the performances were quite predictable,
The whole thing ended at 10.15pm,
And we were rushing to go back home,
Expo is so darn far,
It took us about an hour to reach Kranji,
Lucky enough,
I think we sat the last bus to custom,
But we didn’t manage to catch the last bus to JB,
And there was no taxi at that area,
So we were forced to walk all the way from SG custom to CS,
I wish I could just die there,
Too exaggerate huh,
Reached home at 2.30 am,
And my brother was still awake,
Apparently,
He is waiting for me,
My mum told him to do so,
So yeah you know he isn’t that considerate,
LOL,
He thought that I went to clubbing,
And I was like,
“Sorry ey, I am not you huh”
Was so tired that I decided not to go to school today.

2008-06-07T09:09:00.001Z

Attention seeker.
Totally disgusted by a person like that.
And the sad thing is,
the number of that type of person,
is increasing.

DILEMMA

2008-06-06T08:14:00.002Z

Should I go??
I know I shouldn't be asking a thing like that,
since I have already promised to go,
but,
I have to wake up early for school the next day,
when I am pretty sure that I will be coming home ultra late,
which I estimate will be around 2 am,
another option,
maybe I shall skip school,
but exam is coming soon,
so I will be sleeping for about 5 hours,
and be yawning all the way during that 3 hours,
nah,
whatever it is,
I will still go,
because I am not a person who will ffk,
however,
I don't know if I shall go to school.

EGO ME

2008-06-05T11:25:00.000Z

Am I?
I am just holding on my principle,
Well,
To certain extend,
I believe that I am too much,
Maybe I am just too obstinate,
I just refuse to do so,
No matter how they say,
They don’t understand,
But they can’t be blamed,
If I were them,
I might hate that person (me),
I guess I am wrong,
Like again,
Egoistic,
That’s the most appropriate word to describe me,
I am sorry.

TRUTH HURTS,

LIES KILL.

UPDATE

2008-06-03T12:50:00.000Z

Let me recall what has happened for the past few days,
Hmmm,
Met up with SL and Zul at CS last Wednesday,
Chatting away for quite a while at Roibo,
And the pronunciation of SL for the word “Roibo”,
Totally made me laugh,
Spent some money for earrings and nail polish,
Shopping marathon last Friday,
Went to Plaza Angsana, U-Mall, and Jusco,
That’s madness,
Because we were way to free,
Sleeping away during weekends,
Too lazy to go out,
The weather is driving me crazy,
Exam is approaching,
And I just found out that we are using the school computer lab,
Which I realized it is a big problem to me,
Because it’s Window XP,
And I am so used to Vista,
It will definitely take me some time to figure it out,
Sigh,
I should be lucky that it is not Window 98,
LOL.

I am back

2008-06-03T05:24:00.002Z

Hello people,
I am finally back to blog,
well,
my laptop has been giving me some problem lately,
so yeah,
I am not able to online for quite a while,
erm,
life without laptop is quite sucks actually,
nah,
it's actually bored I would say.
will have some proper update soon.

CHANGE

2008-05-24T16:19:00.002Z

We are different.
Everyone will have to improve.
Or rather they will.
But I beg to differ.
I hate to change.
Be it good or bad.
I just don't like the idea of it.
Maybe I am just deceiving myself.
I may not even know what I want in life.
Which route to take?
Where am I heading to?
What am I holding on?
Why can't I just let go?
Who should I really turn to?
Just have to accept the fact that we are all living in our very own world.

A week passed

2008-05-24T15:16:00.001Z

I guess I must at least finish one chapter of P2,
Or else I will be feeling ultra guilty,
For playing truant last Friday,
What to do,
I seriously don’t like to attend that kind of lecture,
The lecture method which just basically reading word by word,
That’s not lecture for goodness sake,
But hypnotism,
That’s exactly what I can never stand,
Anyway,
Exam for P1 and P2 is getting nearer,
Still don’t know the exact date,
But is somewhere around June,
So many things have been happening,
For the past few weeks,
So hell yeah,
Been thinking real lot for the past few days as well,
I hope I am able to sort things out,
After much deep thinking,
Yeah hopefully,
I love to think,
Things related to life,
Though I am a teenager,
But the way I think,
Makes me wonder if I am an old lady,
Philosopher I guess,
Hahas,
That’s sound so much better.

CLOT

2008-05-22T14:26:00.002Z

obstacle. . .
hindrance. . .
obstruction. . .
impediment. . .
interference. . .
interruption. . .

PRAY

2008-05-19T07:49:00.003Z

I wish I could have a sister like you.
*pardon me for being random again

Life is never fair,
and I guess it's really true,
reading the newspaper,
watching the news on TV,
listening the news on radio,
is all about the Szechuan victims,
not forgetting the Myanmar as well,
it's all so heartbreaking,
I wish I could do something for them,
sometimes,
I really don't understand,
why there are people who can just give up their life by committing suicide,
and at the same time,
there are people who is struggling so hard just to survive,
I guess,
that's what you call LIFE.

THOUGHTS

2008-05-16T14:47:00.000Z

According to many people,
Your high school friends tend to be the truest friend in your life,
To certain extend,
I couldn’t deny that,
But when we have left to different part of route,
I guess something has changed,
Even after we will still be meeting each other,
But something is just different,
I have no idea what has left out,
But we could hardly talk like we used to be,
Sometime,
The awkwardness is in the air,
Why is this so??
I thought we can talk everything under the sun,
But I was wrong,
Well,
Maybe we are all leading our own life,
We have different companion,
We no longer share the common topics,
We don’t really know what’s going on with each other,
Even if we meet up,
We are just crapping away,
Those heart to heart talks,
It seems to be so far away.

p/s: I am not saying anyone out there but it’s just some random thought.

DISASTER

2008-05-14T14:32:00.001Z

Looks like the world we are staying is facing with deep trouble. Many parts of the world have been destroyed by the natural disaster. If you were to asked me why is this happening? All I can say is we human is the main culprit. We have been destroying the natural resources all these while. And now the earth is just trying to preserve whatever they have left. If you think that the Mother Nature is being cruel. Please take look at what you have been contributed to the earth. We are the one who take their place without permission. What right do we actually have to blame others?? If you are still blaming the world but not yourself, you can just jump down from 101 building. Serve us right!!!

DISASTER

2008-05-14T14:32:00.000Z

MUMMY

2008-05-11T12:55:00.002Z

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY to my beloved MUMMY:)

THANKS for everything.
SORRY for anything which I've done wrong.
ILY

SLEEP

2008-05-09T16:34:00.000Z

Its 12.36AM now,
And I am here to blog,
Have a sudden urge to do so,
Been outing recently,
Last Wednesday with Jo and friends,
And went to Jusco TC just now,
Actually was suppose to go to CS today,
With Soo and friends,
But my laziness really kills my mood of going out,
What to do??
I am plain lazy,
Wasted the whole afternoon,
By sleeping away,
I guess that I must be a pig or something near to that,
*watching Youtube halfway blogging*
*back from Youtube*
Having exam in the mid of June,
Have not prepared a single thing yet,
Sigh,
It’s not easy to handle this programme,
But I am real lazy,
Help me!!!
12.45 AM

ABSURD

2008-05-06T02:19:00.001Z

What a world??!
Few days back,
I thought that my MSN acc and Yahoo acc has been hacked,
Like duh,
It is hacked,
And today I receive an email from my Yahoo acc,
And that person/hacker,
Claims that he/she has hacked my account,
Due to some reason,
And guess what,
He/she is now returning both of my acc back to me,
And he/she even asked me to change my password,
So should I be grateful or what,
This is totally madness,
And thanks to the hacker,
I have to create a very weird password,
To prevent the same thing to happen again,
Nah,
What else could happen huh??

HACKER

2008-05-01T14:06:00.002Z

HELLO people,
just want to tell you guys that,
my MSN acc has been hacked,
so please give me ur MSN add,
this is giving me hell loads of problem,
I have lost so many add,
DAMN IT!!!!
how I hate those hacker.

A YEAR

2008-04-27T15:24:00.001Z

Being able to study in poly is always what I hope for after completing my SPM,
Without any obstacles, unlike some of my friends,
I was arranged to study in NP,
At first, I don’t really like the idea of it,
Because that was not my first choice,
After learning that NP was the best business school among those 5 poly,
I realize that I was actually given a chance to study in a better environment,
Why did I choose poly instead of studying in KL in the first place??
Because I always love the lifestyle and environment of SG,
Without hesitation, SG was definitely my first choice of place to pursue my studies,
Just like those people out there,
I thought that my life here would be a blast and I am going to enjoy my life,
And also the absolute freedom I have here,
Somehow, I really have to admit that whatever you imagine is not necessary to be true,
I have been there for a year,
And I live like them,
I am getting used to it with the lifestyle there,
I was happy to have know so many great people there,
What I learnt there were really too much to be listed down,
After much consideration,
I have decided to withdraw my course there and continue my studies back in Msia,
Many people out there thought that I was mad over the choice I have made,
But you know what,
For the past 18 years,
I have no idea at all what I really want in my life,
Until now only I realize that I have actually found it,
And I no longer will live for others but myself,
I want to do something for myself,
In fact none of those out there have actually support my decision,
Not even my parents,
They think that I am only wasting my own time and finding excuses,
But still they did not object about it,
I would like to say that,
I have not wasted the one whole year in SG,
I have experienced the so called life that I have been longing since 17 years old,
I was given the chance to pick up new skill,
Not forgetting that I have also become more independent,
I learnt how to stay alone and handle my problem all by myself,
I enjoy every bit of it during my stay there,
I have not regretted over the choices I have made,
Though I know that they were people calling me stupid upon my decision,
Because they are many people out there who want to study so much in SG,
And yet I just gave up like that,
No matter what,
That one whole year experience in SG,
Will never be forgotten,
I won’t forget the time when I am rushing for assignments,
Those days in lecture hall,
And also my very first individual presentation,
Role playing with IS mates,
Those days were great and unforgettable.
What I have been going through,
Aren’t really easy,
Until you have experienced that all by yourself,

There’s a few person who I would like to thank:
My parents for sure, especially my daddy,
Thanks for being my financial support,
Who always listen to my decision and never object every bit of it,
I know that you always wanted me to study there,
But somehow I have disappointed you by making this decision,
I am sorry that I have been wasting your money to experience the so called life I want,
I am also sorry that I always have the mentality that being away from home is better,
Because only then I can have the absolute freedom,
After some time,
Only I realize that home is the place where I belong,
My mummy, though you are quite troublesome at times,
I am still very grateful because you have given me lots of advice,
Though I never listen to it,
I am sorry too if I ever said anything that hurt you,
My uncle and auntie,
Who has actually take good care of me during my stay there,
And provided me a place to stay,
I have never felt neglected during my stay there,
You all have really helped me a lot,
And make me understand that relatives can some time be very important,
Other than my own family,
Miss Tan for giving me all the advices,
The teacher/staff who attend us during the day I withdraw my course,
She’s trying real hard to persuade me,
By sharing her very own experiences,
I am really grateful,
Though I have disappointed you in a way that,
I have still submitted that withdrawal form,
After so much you have been telling me,
I won’t forget those words that you have mentioned,
And all the friends I know there,
You know who you are,
I don’t think that I have to list down one by one,
Take care everyone and hopefully we can still meet some other day.

Thinking!

2008-04-23T14:45:00.002Z

Hmmm. . .
don't know what to blog,
I am thinking now. . .
thinking real hard. . .
well,
I shall proceed before I heard "shoo",
studying costing today,
the lecturer keep on repeating all the things he said,
"is either you get it or you don't"
keep repeating this sentence,
and I was like damn frustrated,
because the whole concept wasn't really that complicated,
but he is making all of us confusing,
until he has to use some kindergarden illustration,
and that was seriously lame,
when I think of my life will be surrounding by figures,
I started to worry about my future occupation,
accountancy can be very boring,
it is boring,
no fun,
no excitement,
but numbers and more numbers,
"yawn",
but I have already chosen it to be my life partner,
LOL,
till then.

"-"

2008-04-21T14:22:00.001Z

I want to bid goodbye,
To the world I once know,
I want to restart my life,
And say goodbye to every single thing,
I once had,
I once know,
Be it the last time,
I want to start it all over again,
I don’t mind,
Giving up everything I had,
To do that,
I gave up a better environment,
I gave up an opportunity which everyone is dying for it,
But so what,
I am now happier,
But I will miss those days,
It was memorable,
At least I have experienced,
Something I always want to,
And I have proved them wrong,
I feel like I am on the top of the world,
But I gave up my position of that,
Though they were people calling me stupid,
But hey,
I don’t care,
Because I am living for myself,
And not you, YOU, you, YOU or you.